Winter05-06 archive

(not all bad)
I never really gave the Memphis breakdown. It ruled. Same political "what is blues anyway?" kind of result with the competition, but that's not why we go. The food, the people, the history... that's the reason. Meeting my cousin and his girlfriend, spending more time with my aunt and uncle... all the better. Its such a weird feeling to be discovering and entire side of your family at 28. Its also weird seeing "28". Still feels like 19 or so. But that's another rant.

The following week was the non-stop work marathon which just culminated in a much-needed bank account boost. The week after that (this past one), Sara was in town and I had a fantastic gig over at The G-Spot, a performance space in an old mill on the banks of the Jones Falls... one mile from downtown but looking more like two centuries away. I love mills and mill towns. Really wish I could have afforded a house over in that part of town. But I digress... the show was great. Been too long since I've feelt that all-encompassing rock-show-flow .Ryan's songs are a lot of fun to play, and the rest of the band (otherwise known as Park Police) held it down. I hope we do more shows this spring. It was also cool catching up with so many old friends who just happened to be there... music, college, random city friends... such a typically Baltimorean night. No matter how hard it tries, its just a small town.

Sara and I had a great round of restaurant hunting. One unsatisfying Little Italy attempt at least resulted (as most do) in some entertainment value. As with most unsatisfying restaurants with bad service in highly ethnic neighborhoods... you start to wonder if its just a front for some mafioso. Indian at Banjara in Federal Hill made up for it the following night. If I only lived a mile and a half further north, they'd deliver. Bah.

Speaking of scooting around the city... I'm inches away from pulling the trigger on a Vespa. Have justified it from a few directions, just can't get past the "but I already have a bike" argument. Though its not a two-stroke, 150cc hand-shift bike now, is it?

This weekend will find me in New Orleans with aforementioned "new" family. Only going to be there for about 28 hours, but it will be great to see everyone and get some of the pre-Mardi Gras vibe, especially poignant this year. Shame I can't stay longer... or can't I? <cough>

Next weekend, I just booked for a quick trip to Minneapolis. For someone who complains about not having enough free time, I've been doing a whole lot of moving around this year.

Three helpless, shivering kids from the projects, the police, and a high pulse rate were all hanging out here about an hour ago. Apparently some armed assholes stuck up a bunch of teenagers playing basketball at the school down the street. As the kids ran, the guys followed them. I heard someone screaming for help in my backyard, and saw two kids hiding under my neighbor's pickup truck. Frantic banging on my side door followed a few minutes later. I let the kids in, called the cops, and saw the thug's cars speed out of the school parking lot with no lights on or plates showing. God bless the Baltimore po-lice... as unnecessary as the cameras, flashing lights, and constant helicopter presence over the city all are, three cruisers showed up within 2 minutes, then about 5 more arrived after that. (I recall average response time in PG County was about 19 minutes.)

Its a hard-knock life... for us.

(Oh, let the record show that both Otis and Shirley tore ass upstairs and hid under the bed when the door was knocked on. I want a Husky.)

(not dead yet)
In the middle of a 14 day work stretch. Concurrently running both the bike sales and working the parts counter at work, then at night going to both the Baltimore Motorcycle and Car shows. Should be about a 70 hour pay period. In the middle of all of that, nature gave a nice relaxing winter reprise. Not enough to be chaotic, just beautiful and mood-enhancing.

Fresh snow makes me nervous. I felt bad even walking on it. 1 foot of fresh snow, untouched by tire treads, shoes, or the sun... an amazingly rare and wonderful thing.

(give me back my ball)
I've watched Saturday Night Live since 1981 or so. There are only a handful of really, really good music performances I can think of, and Prince's first song tonight just made it to the list. Amazing. No over the top stage theatrics or unnecessary instruments. Drums, bass, keyboards, and Prince absolutely ruling the guitar. Almost makes me wanna... squeeze into my badass red jeans!

I know it makes me not only gay but also super euro-trash, but I think Kylie Minogue's 2002 return to American pop culture Can't Get You Out Of My Head is on the list as well.

A rare and fleeting world affairs tangent. I'm amazed how little backstory is revealed in the major news outlets with regards to this whole "Danish Cartoon Jihad". With about 45 minutes of digging around on the internet, here's the basics that I've yet to hear anywhere else.

A few months ago, J-P held an invitational where people could create their idea of what Mohammed might look like. They published 12 ranging from amateur sketches to commercial-quality prints. Nothing terrible, but some strong ideas. As it was copied further and further, the version that seems to have hit the mideast also featured a crudely photocopied depiction of Mohammed (a middle aged white guy) wearing a pig mask and talking into a microphone... (I would suspect this image actually came from some sort of deep-south 4-H fair), and one where a... (well, I was going to say Photoshopped, but its actually just cut-and-pasted) dog makes love to Mohammed during prayer (also possibly from a 4-H fair?). Obviously, not published in the original J-P layout, but enough to start a jihad. Pop Radical Islam seems (no surprise) like the kid on the playground who is ready to fight when someone tells him they thought they heard someone say you may have said something to someone a few days ago about his mom or something like that.

Of course, the media doesn't help. It could clearly state that the majority of the conflict has arisen from something clearly not ever a part of the J-P layout to begin with... but instead they just keep referring to "offensive images". So when other people say they stick by the editorial decisions, support the paper, the country, etc... the less-informed assume they're all basically saying, "Us white folks do think Mohammed is a dogfucker." And the playground fight escalates.

Well, enjoy these fine sacreligeous images not only from J-P but from all over the western world, for the last couple of centuries. My favorite is South Park Mohammed. When I rule the world, we'll all do two things : laugh more, and check facts more. Those two go hand in hand more often than not.

(hey watch this)
Ahh... just what I needed. Mud, gasoline, severely pulled muscles, and Michael McDonald.

Got up at 7am, ate some yogurt, jumped on the Strom and headed out 125 miles or so, out west of Shenandoah. Met up with Omar (on his XR650) and some ADVrider folks (on a BMW R1150GS and F650GS), and got the bikes nice and muddy in George Washington Nat'l Forest by defying both gravity and accepted friction coefficients... two things I don't do nearly enough on motorcycles.

It was only 34 out, but Gerbing's fixed that, and once we started really getting into the crap, even they were unnecessary. Between the rocks, jumps, logs, and mud patches, it became a major workout just to keep going forward. And of course, I had to go and get cocky. I hit one patch of mud that clearly had something to prove. Actually, it let me off easy... the front wheel started to slip, so I gave it gas to recover (way too much, of course - looks a lot cooler that way, and I've been watching Dust to Glory again... that technique works great for an XR400, but not so much for my 500lb poseur fake-dual sport V-Strom). Got the bike completely crossed up (sweeeet!), but then just as I hit 90 degrees and thought it would get ugly, I come to a complete stop. The cold Virginia mud had swallowed enough of my wheels that the bike was stuck... but completely upright, with no actual parts touching anything. Very impressive...

After some amazing views, more near-wipeouts, and a considerably slower pace once we realized we're not as badass as we thought, it was time to get back onto pavement. The sun goes down quick in the mountains. We headed back to civilization (never thought I'd say that about the I-81 corridor) for dinner at Johnny Appleseed's Family Restaurant (complete with complementary apple fritter and overpriced - but damn tasty - hot cider), then it was mostly high speed superslab back, save for the 10 mile grin run between Jessup and my house that I can never resist. Next time you're out here, ask me to show it to you.

I've got some cleaning to do, but luckily the rain today helped.

Never fails... one very good day on the bike (preferably deep in the wild with some good friends) dispels a few weeks of angsty blah-ness. I need this kind of therapy more often. Motorcycle parts and Excedrin are still cheaper than psychologists. And coughing up dust while downing a Sam Adams Doppelbock after a hot shower, noticing all sorts of new bruises you don't remember getting... that's an easy confirmation of progress.

Now where did Michael McDonald fit in? Hope you have a few minutes to spare. You need to watch these from Episode One to the end. Especially you, Matt.

YACHT ROCK

("I've got your life jacket right here... it's called the Eighties, and its gonna be around FOREVER."

"F you, Loggins... the Eighties can suck it.... big time!")

(the best reason to buy the sun)
Gah. Mood swings suck. But its good when you can see them coming, or at least identify them in the moment... though you'd think that angsty dark cloud would stop popping up after high school. You'd think wrong.

Just trying to ride it out, but a combination of new stresses at work, the house, and my general outlook on the present state of things combined with the unfortunately everpresent residue of last two or three years... no good. I'm usually pretty upbeat and forward-looking, or at least try to be, but lately I've been feeling very disappointed. Just like I've been giving everying I have, on all fronts (artistically, professionally, emotionally, etc) and all of that effort has resulted in very little, if anything at all. Oh, boo f'n hoo.

Further, less shoegazey thoughts into this vibe reveal a lot about how I apply my energy... where I throw my purpose and passion. Its in my nature to be giving all and receiving none, and it just took me this long to figure out its not the best thing to do. Ah well... being January, I can say "well, things will change this year." I think I already have said that, actually. We'll check in on that statement later and see what becomes of it.

There was something I meant to tell you... ah well, it'll come back to me eventually. A more happy, interesting-content-filled submission will be along shortly. For now, this wave is being ridden. (Why not listen to the soundtrack at your right?)

(dreams were your ticket out)
So we're well past the "mid-20s". This is about the last stand of "late-20s" before "pretty much 30" kicks in. (No offense to my elders). Where did I think I'd be at 28? I don't know. Never really had a plan in that regard. Thanks to TV, movies, and imagination I always assumed an interesting and fulfilling life would just happen... and it has. So no real complaints there I suppose. But I could use more money.

Turns out the "new plumbing" that was promised in the purchase of my rickety mess of a house was doublespeak for "new horribly installed plumbing with no permit history". No surprise. These little discoveries are getting better every month. Just before picking up Sara at the airport on the 29th, the kitchen sink filled up with blue soapy water. And kept filling. And kept filling. Long story short, the sewage line leading from my house back to the city line was poorly installed and it began backing up. I was lucky that was just washing machine drainage and not... well... you figure it out. Luckily the Dunkin' Donuts down the street is 24 hours and has a clean bathroom. $800 for the quick fix, and probably $4000 necessary within the next 4-6 months $4000. Oh, and the plumber put a huge hole in my wall and knocked out 1/3 of my main load-bearing post in the back of the house. And did I mention the $4000? Gah.

But Sara came out. Between my work and her school schedule, we have been able to have a great time doing cute things that people dating are supposed to be able to do. Forgot how great that felt. I have a kitchen full of new cookware, serving utensils, plates, dishes... its amazing. I'm overwhelmed... and clueless... but I can't wait to start actually cooking. I have a new sweater. Homegirl's got skills. We went to the range with my .38. Osama tried to hate our freedom, but I got him in the crotch and head about 80 times. Sara aimed for the heart but more or less just took out his beard. In the end, maybe that sort of emasculation would do more harm. Our freedoms remain intact. You can all rest feeling safe and secure.

Sara wasn't the only houseguest this past two weeks... Otis and Shirley have returned. Strangely, Shirley seems more well adjusted to the new surroundings than Oat. He's nervous and jittery in the new place, while she just rolls around on the carpet all day. They're really not cats. More like small fickle dogs with vanity problems and short faces. Or just small furry humans. But it feels great to have 'em around again. Thanks to Andy for taking care of them the past few months.

So some birthday-related tunes to your right. I've also been tinkering with the recording gear, trying to get into somewhat of a Charles Earland groove these days. Haven't had much time to myself, but after sitting down for 10 minutes, some funky ideas are coming.

Taking Sara to the airport later today... grr. It will be a busy few weeks from here on out, though. Interesting new music projects on the horizon, great shows, good travel. The stuff I wanted to do when I grew up.

(Denny's coffee jitters)
Q : what happens when you combine the godfather of soul with the godfather of DC go-go in the same night, on the same stage?

A : a party, mofos!

Music's most important Browns ('cause Bobby was never really all that talented when you think about it) blew DC's head apart tonight. Shame on anyone with soul who missed it. Perhaps you should be looking for Kenny G tickets next time around? Yeah I said it.

Words can't descibe. I almost punched out the ponytailed 9:30 club usher who was trying to get me to move just before James Himself walked out on stage. Even if I was ejected for usher-mutilation, it'd have been worth it. Red suit, head to toe... black fringe... coiffed now more than ever. Screw Dick Clark... this man does not age. He had the voice, the moves... the band in matching suits. It was a show to end all shows, especially with the unbelievably strong set by DC legend Chuck Brown setting it off. Tomorrow will find us all in go-go comas fo sho' (props to Sara M)

It was my christmas present to my dad (who last saw James in Augusta, GA in '67). Amazing to think that 40 years later, JB's still delivering. Then again, Dad still plays competitive softball about every day in the summer. And I'm getting self-conscious about 28? Shame on this honky.

Christmas came and went... low key, laid-back, and very very cool. The new traditions are set. The Conlin boys get together, drink, eat, make profound statements about life, God, the female psyche, guns, music, and old Saturday Night Live references... and life is good.

Been a tense few weeks, and there's no need for that. Hopefully this next few will be nice and easy... just being myself and having fun. What more do you need in life? Now I'm sounding like my Christmas card again... aww heck, Gimme the bridge, y'all, gimme the bridge, y'all...

(counting fingers)
First, a thought... What is with this year's sudden rush of "War on Christmas" claims by the far right talking heads? Sure, the political-correctness balance is always teetering for and against reason (and there no doubt have been some really stupid moves by the far left to de-Christmasize America)... but that's nothing new. A "War?" The people who really are pushing true missiles-and-death war all over the rest of the world are whining about a "War" against their religious rights? Nope. Not happening. No need to get into a rant here... but my point was simply this : Christmas is such a ridiculously overcommercialized holiday to begin with (Charles Shultz was commenting on that 40 years ago with his beloved cartoon and its only gotten worse,) shouldn't the true Christian position be one rallying against the gross overmarketing of Jesus' birth to begin with, rather than mean-spirited "boycotting" and "friend-or-foe-ing" of retail outlets that simply wish to offer courtesy to Jews (Jesus' own homeboys) and those of other (or no) specific faith? My real guess is that Jesus would prefer not to see His birthday turned into such a garish spectacle to begin with... not to mention "His" people loudly proclaiming other human beings to be "foes" in the public arena because of a petty disagreement. But what do I know?

Helped dad set up the tree the other day, and the collection of ornaments, each with their own story, seemed to tell the entire history of our family in one instance... like a quick warm feeling of accomplishment and humility. We're ok. Life's been good to us.

After reading the yearly round of neighborhood Christmas cards with epic retellings of everyone's conquests and triumphs of the past year, I sat down and quickly cranked out my own. Then I realized one paragraph in that this year was more one of quiet reinforcement than forward attack. Nothing wrong with that... it was quite necessary. But despite their ups and downs the last two years had some really groundbreaking moments. This year (while featuring some serious lows) was more filled with an even-keeled kind of steady progress. Of course, that just means I'm rearing to go into 2006 head-first, guns blazin', snappin' necks and cashin' large checks. Or something like that.

I hope everyone is having a good relaxed holiday, is getting to spend time with the ones most important to you, and is ready to charge forward into making 2006 better than ever (I think as a whole, humanity needs a few really good years sometime soon.)

New music up to your right... another very strange mix that's not entirely Christmas-centric... but it seriously flows, and I'm particularly proud of this one. Hope it helps your holiday spirit as well. Keep your chin up, this year's almost done. See you on the other side-

(who's gettin' whatcha got?)

Christmas time approaches... two good snows help the impending cheer... but for the most part it hasn't felt terribly overwhelming yet. Not that its supposed to. Maybe that's because I have very little shopping/giftmaking to do this year (one of the few benefits of having a nearly nonexistent extended family). The last two years I went all out on the giftmaking - but not so much this year. I'm tired and broke. I guess I figure the people who are important to me know they are, so that's what they're getting for Christmas. My continued friendship. I got nothing to prove. And what does useless crap really tell someone about how you value them? Especially when they KNOW you're broke. Well maybe that's it.

So I walked a transvestite back to the Metro from Chaos after a wild night out with Dukr, Robin, Heather, Rusty(?), Heather, and "Cat" - yes, the driver's license even said Cat. Sometimes you don't realize how generally nice you are until something absurd is happening, people are staring, and you just get the joke as you walk away. But the neighborhood is sketchy and Cat was a major source of entertainment earlier in the night for everyone, so its the least (well, actually the most) I could do.

Saturday was a trip to Talking Head for the Gary vs. Gary show... Gary B against Gary E of Mazeltov Cocktails... and Matt Dahl... and some pop band that should have been playing in Arlington. Hung out with the Water School boys and talked about ideas. Ideas are good. Music is good. Baltimore is good for music. I can't wait to get more hometown music roots down this year.

Good times in general. Lots of reuinions on one front, and lots of closing up and moving forward into the great unknown on another. Always a good feeling. New music to your right, check it out. Good holiday wishes to all of ye - enjoy the whole fellowship and goodwill thing... refrain from the stress and rage best you can. Extra good vibes to Sara in the thick of end-of-semester madness. In a few days, there will be no lawyer wannabes around you (for a few weeks at least)

(c'mon down ta my house)
Funny how progress comes in waves. I get tired and lose momentum, then wallow, then bolt forward like lightning. In the last 72 hours, I have 80% of the electrical problems in my house fixed (the biggest problem turned out to be BG&E's - which means it was fixed for free). Still no range or dryer, but they're going to be on this week. Tomorrow involves a caulk party. Get yo' minds out da gutter.

Also digging back in to the creative. Audio and video gear is plugged back in. Been doodling with some new song ideas, wrapping up the Mike Roy concert DVD production, and finally got around to something I've been thinking about for years (look right).

Talked to Mike Roy for the first time in ages tonight. Trying to tie up a bunch of loose ends in the friendship department (and rid myself of some ghosts), and am having good success so far.

I electrocuted three mice last week. One squirrel to go. And a plumber is coming to adress the return of the breaddy-water. The more I think about it, the less I want to think about it.

Sundried Tomato & Basil Wheat Thins are worthy of a small religion. I need to get out more.